Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
