I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
