I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
