Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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