Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
