I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Dick very happy bro
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