I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
