How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
