Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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