He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
