That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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