so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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