I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
