If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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