Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
