just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
