Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize
