Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
