found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize