thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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