Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
