Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
