okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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