But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
and you fell through a lawn chair
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
