I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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