wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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