It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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