so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
