marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
