I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
