You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
