What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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