So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
