That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
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The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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