And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
