I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Randomize
