I can tuck mytits in my pants
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
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