We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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