just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
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YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
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All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.