Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
vagina is talking i cant
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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