omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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