hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
