Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
