he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
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He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
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That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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