Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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