trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
