PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize
