p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
