So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
This is my gift to your gina
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
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