we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
We talked him into tasing himself.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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