Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Life is so much better after having sex.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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