Hey man sorry I got all grabby
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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