the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
then he tried to convert me to islam
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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